First off, this doesn't work. With or without a large collection of rows in a table. And everything is valid, Engine is MyISAM, the AGAINST argument is a string literal, my FULL Text column is TEXT and that is valid.
And by the way, I'm using PDO MySQL Driver for the querying procedure in case that affects the query in anyway.
And Yes I've tried IN BOOLEAN MODE which I don't seem to need at all, and even without Query Expansion.
Even if I add a keyword that's short enough to make the query work, it doesn't.
VillageIdiot can have my babbies ;d