SurpassHosting gives you your own php.ini, .htaccess, though I don't think they let you tamper with http.conf. For $60/year with excellent uptime and good support response times. Been with them just over a year now.

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Programmers are in a race with the Universe to create bigger and better idiot-proof programs, while the Universe is trying to create bigger and better idiots. So far the Universe is winning. - Rich Cook